Strange Japanese Band Names

I’m in a bit of a rush today so in leiu of anything of real merit here is a list of amusing japanese band names.

Apui – they’re not at all shit.

Balzac – also a bit harsh on themselves.

Beck: Mongolian Chop Squad – I really fancy a Mongolian chop right now. How about you famous alt rock musician Beck?

Bump of Chicken – this sounds significantly less appealing than a Mongolian chop.

The Candy Spooky Theater – and now I want some candy.

The Chewinggum Weekend – remember that weekend we chewed some gum? good times man, good times.

Earl Grey – what is it with the food themed names anyway?

Fake? – enigmatic?

The Gerogerigegege – I actually know what this means in Japanese and it still doesn’t make any bloody sense.

Godzilla and Yellow Gypsy – one of the weaker entires in the series. A traveller is not really a match for an 80 storey atomic fire breathing lizard no matter what the Daily Mail says.

Golf and Mike – this is a duo and neither of these are their real names. I understand the whole taking a nickname thing so I have no problem with golf but why Mike? His real name is Pirath, where’s he getting Mike from?

Happy End – I’ve got a very happy end right here, nudge, nudge, wink wink.

Head Phones President – I intend the visit the land of headphones one of these days. I hear it’s very quiet.

Husking Bee – ….a….no….no jokes fail me.

Hey Sey 7 – ok. seven…..was that meant to do anything?

kinki kids – I know why they’re kinki, they’re kinki for the same reason I am. Can you guess what I mean? Answers on a self-adressed postcard.

kome kome club – that’s ko-meh, ko-meh club and not what you were all thinking perverts.

MALICE MIZER – actually quite a good band. their name is short for malice and misery. It’s the answer to their own question, what is a human being made of? Malice and misery. Good band but they should cheer up.

Maximum the Hormone – ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Melt-Banana – ok…ewwwwwwwwww

Merengue – is it a pudding or a merengue? No it’s a band. Bet they’d go well with melt-banana.

Mr. Children – I know technically there is nothing wrong with this guys name but honestly doesn’t he sound just a little creepy?

Puffy AmiYumi – Ami and Yumi are their names and they are both apparently puffy.

actually in reality they’re not at all.

Fun Fact: Puffy Ami Yumi have their own cartoon in America but not in Japan. Also they sang the fantastic theme song to the Teen Titans cartoon.

Rice – seriously what is with the food names?

Seagull Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her – this one is significantly less funny if you know what it’s a reference to. Answers on a self adressed postcard. Dad I expect you to get this.

Shilfee and the Tulipcorobockles – also known as the band that got their name when a cat sat on their keyboard.

Shonen Knife – translates as “girly knife” which sounds like an Australian insult.

SMAP – SPORT MUSIC ACTION PEOPLE. The Japanese Boyzone and exactly as horrifying as that mental picture is.

SONS OF ALL PUSSYS – Wait. All pussys? how does that work exactly? Surely you can only be the son of one pussy. Unless your a cat in which case at most you can be the son of 2 but in no way can you be the son of all pussys. No I think you need to rethink this one.

The System of Alive – I kind of want them to fight System of a Down. Don’t you?

Thee Michelle Gun Elephant – I christen thee michelle gun elephant. May god have mercy on thee and all who sail in thee.

Vajra – okay I admit I’m stretching now

AND NOW THE FUNNIEST BAND NAME THAT HAS EVER BEEN
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SPREAD BEAVER

Now if this were some punk band trying to be shocking it wouldn’t be funny at all but this guy is a sort of Mum’s favourite ballady type sunger. Think of him as the Japanese Ronan Keating….except his name sounds like a sexual instruction.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I’m done.

(I’m sory for everything Mum, really it isn’t your fault that I turned out like this.)

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3 comments
  1. Not sure why you thought i’d get the screaming seagulls reference but after a bit of wickipediaing I found out there name comes from a line in a song by XTC – a band I liked as a youngster!!!My favorite from the list is – Shilfee and the Tulipcorobocklesjust for the sheer nonsense of it allcheers dad

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  2. As you should know from the manga volume (Shonen Jump), shonen is boys, and shoujo is girls. Hence not girly knife, but boyish knife… possibly less funny, but still an odd name. Chu ^_^

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  3. Adam said:

    Gah! Yes I should know that, shonen is boy shoujo is girl.They’re a girl band, that’s probably what threw me.

    Like

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